Sometimes winter holds off just long enough that you allow yourself to foolishly ponder for a moment that maybe for some reason the cosmos has decided to spare us Dakotans the discomfort of wind chill and early morning window scrapping. Holding such a tantalizingly thought in one’s head leaves you with a feeling of mischievous giddiness.

The very same feeling you get when you goad someone bigger, stronger, and meaner to chase you in the dark towards a trip line you and your equally small and weak buddies strategically placed in the hopes of toppling the before mentioned bigger, stronger, meaner individual. Why? For the adventure of course. As with any plan, especially those hatched in the minds of small boys, there are things that can go wrong and there are many…many things overlooked and not accounted for.

Things that you and your buddies didn’t consider, or you, being the bait, didn’t consider, so your buddies decided not to bring it up and leave well enough alone and let the chips (a.k.a. you) fall where they may. Personal concern regarding the effectiveness and overall success of such a plan directly correlates with one’s proximity to the bigger, stronger, meaner variable during the execution of the plan. The “brains” and “bait” of an operation are never the same person.

Important questions like, “What if the bigger, stronger, and meaner kid catches me before I reach the trip line? What if the bigger, stronger, meaner kid decides to just pound the brains of the operation instead of expending energy chasing the bait? What happens if the bigger, stronger, meaner kid misses the trip line?” Perhaps, more importantly, what happens if the plan is a success and the bigger, stronger, meaner kid gives chase, trips, rolls, and skids to an agonizingly angry stop?

Such a plan skids to a stop at the very same point in the minds of young boys and one of them will experience agony. No mind is paid to what happens after the bigger, stronger, meaner kid trips…skids…curses…and gets back up. Gets back up meaner and seemingly stronger. Having been avid fans of the Incredible Hulk series we should have known better.

At this point the plan is over leaving this one big “what if” to test how well the brains, the bait, and everyone else on the dream team can improvise and overcome. This is also the point where the “brains”, generally a bit slower of foot than the bait, finds themselves in closer proximity to the now stronger and meaner variable than they had anticipated.

In such a situation every kids worth his salt knows that to avoid angry noogies, snuggies, and knees to soft vitals you must outrun one of your “friends”. If you’re the bait you had a running start and are more likely to have a noogie-free, snuggie-free, knee to the soft vitals-free evening. Outrunning a physical threat is exhilarating. You almost feel bad for the slothy, wild eyed co-conspirator that you high step by while they erratically pump and flail with one arm, holding their pants up with the other, knowing full well that the bigger, stronger, meaner kid is angrily closing the gap.

Mean old winter closed the gap in a hurry this weekend and put the snow boots to that mischievous giddiness I was feeling. I watched solemnly as negative wind chills kicked up swirls of fresh snow leaving me to wonder why I hadn’t braved the 65 degree weather the day before and hung up the Christmas lights.

There’s no adventure in it that’s why. How am I supposed to drum up material to write about for you fine folks if I go around hanging up Christmas lights on perfectly beautiful days with little or no chance of slipping on a patch of ice 15 feet off the ground while in a tangle of blinking lights? Once the bait always the bait. Happy Holidays my friends.