Last week a man in Tehran, Iran was arrested for attempted bank robbery. Bank robberies happen every day, but this one struck me to be a bit more interesting than your average run of the mill bank heist.

The would be bank robber didn’t use a gun, didn’t hand the teller a threatening note, and didn’t break in after hours. It seems this gentleman was an innovator in the field and wanted to expand on the old fashioned way of relieving a bank of large amounts of money. He didn’t even invest in a ski mask, which are probably hard to come by in Tehran. Never been there but I’m sure skiing isn’t a top tourist attraction.

It seems that bank patrons became suspicious when the gentleman simply began taking money out of their hands, and acting as if they couldn’t see him. Acting as if he were invisible. Now what would make a grown man believe he’s invisible? The sorcerer that he paid $500 to for invisibility spells of course. Obviously this sorcerer wasn’t very reputable and gave him a bum spell.

The police are looking for this sorcerer for questioning but oddly enough they can’t find him. I guess they’ll have to wait until $500 floats into a bank to be deposited.

Imagine your surprise if you were traipsing around believing you were invisible, snatching money left and right, and you get tackled and apprehended. You would have to think that maybe they just got lucky, but then again that punch to the head and kick to the groin was spot on.

Personally if I were in the market for invisibility spells I wouldn’t just dish out $500 to the first sorcerer I happened upon. You need to shop around, get a few quotes, ask for names and numbers of other satisfied customers, make sure the sorcerers is certified and in good standing with the sorcerer union.

Be suspicious of brochures with glowing testimonials from famous people. Especially famous people that have proven themselves to be zealot’s and nut jobs, like Tom Cruise for instance.

Once you’ve done your homework and have settled on the sorcerer you believe to be the most reputable, most powerful, or have the cheapest rates, go ahead and buy with confidence.

One more thing I might do once I’ve purchased my invisibility spell is test it out before doing anything that might get me jail time and a burly boyfriend. You know maybe invites some friends over, answer the door under the cloak of invisibility and see if they say, “Hey, Zamfir how you doin'?” or “Wow, that door opened all by itself, and it smells like Zamfir is right here but I don’t see him anywhere….not anywhere at all!”

Or if you don’t have any friends which could be the case if you’re out shopping for invisibility spells, just call for pizza delivery. Or, here’s a crazy idea…just glance in a mirror.

The take home message is that you need to be careful. There are sorcerers out there that will take advantage of people, and then somehow disappear. For those of you hoping to gain access to shower rooms or yes even rob banks I have recently completed my studies in invisibility and am now accepting clients.

See you later…or will you…